So, it's 1960. Li'l Clemmy is 4 years old. He's playing in the front yard where his Momz can keep an eye on him. A boy from down the block comes riding up on a 2-wheeler. He notices Clemmy's training wheels and says: "You want me to help you learn to ride without those extra wheels? I'm Tony, by the way..."
And that was the day that I made my first friend without direct parental influence.
We hung out all through our elementary school years, and started to drift apart during Jr Hi. Different social circles and all... you know how it goes. On the rare occasions that we would hang, it always felt the same- like no time had passed. Sr. Hi was more of the same. Even though I was college prep and he was vocational track, the bond was always close.
I stopped out of college after my Junior year. Just burned out on tests, practicing, the whole academic scene. Came home, shacked up at the parents house and took a blue-collar job. Zero social outlets with all my shiftwork... and my HS pals were all still finishing up their undergrad careers. I finished a first shift day and was hanging at home, when there was a knock at the back door. There was Tony. "C'mon, man... there's someplace I want you to see." We hop in his old turquoise 65 Chevy Biscayne and ended up at the local YMCA.
"Follow me."
We went down the stairs to the basement level- somewhere I'd never been in all my years of membership.
"Take off your shoes; follow my lead..." Then he bowed deeply at the waist, and walked through the door. 20 people in Karate uniforms snapped to attention, and raced to line up on the center line of the dojo. They all bowed in unison and said in chorus: "Ready to learn, sensei!" While I was off at school, Tony had completed his karate training and was a certified 2nd degree black belt in Eugue-Ryu Karate- a very hard, direct, punishing Japanese/Okinawan style of martial arts. He and a HS classmate of mine, Michael Young were the teachers. I became a Dragon (the club's mascot) that day.
That dojo became my home for the next 7 years. Tony and Michael became my running mates. I'd found My Peeps. Karate tournaments, club-hopping, concerts, weekend jaunts to other towns... my early 20's were a pretty special time.
July, 1979. Tuesday. I had dinner with My Parents, and was planning to go early to Karate. My Pops was playing in the citywide racquetball tournament (senior div), and I wanted to check out a match before class. At the last minute, I decided to ride my bike instead of drive. The trip took an extra 10 minutes because of my decision. When I rolled up, there was a small crowd in front of the Y. Tony was there, too. He sees me, and walks me away from the entrance.
Bro- class has been cancelled tonight. Toss your bike in the back, and let's go for a ride." We drove in silence for about 20 minutes, and ended up at Bressler reservoir, about 4 miles west of town. As we sat looking at that placid body of water, Tony gently and compassionately informed me that My Father had died on that racquetball court not 20 minutes before my arrival (weeks later, it dawned on me that had I driven to the Y that day, I would have arrived at the exact moment My Father's corpse would have been hauled through the front door, and placed in the EMT van).
My next 2 years were a struggle for everyone who knew me. Without My Pops, I was rudderless. Angry. Mean. Violent. Self-destructive. And Tony was there, the entire time- pulling me back from the precipice of insanity, pulling me out of night clubs just before the fists started flying, rallying my Dragon brothers and sisters to embrace me and keep me near until I could find my footing again.
He was with me when I got married. He invited me to be with him when he married Terri. He invited me to be one of the first to hold and kiss his two angels, Joya Ann and Tyler when they entered the world. He held me up when My Momz passed in 1993. And he always had my back, no matter what.
And yesterday, at around 1:30PM, my very first friend in Life left us all.
Smart. Funny. Soft/sweet. Hard as nails. Wise. A poet. A philosopher. A warrior.
I'm not posting this as a bid to call attention to myself. I'm doing this as a tribute to friends/family who have made us who we are. I'm doing it to encourage you all to make the most of the relationships you have.
Because tomorrow is a promise that one day will not be kept.
Peace,
Clem.
